I should have stayed home...

So I decide to venture out into the street today and get some work done. Mind you I have about 1/4 tank of gas left in my car, which should take me a long way at 34 MPG.

As I drive the main road back to civilization, I see a bad omen. There are only two gas stations here, and one is out of gas and the other one has a line of cars all the way to the street. I should have turned back right then, but I pressed on thinking it wouldn't be as bad in the city. When I get to the city, every damn gas station I pass is either out of gas or has an unbearably long line. I figured I'd have enough gas to get back home but then, I wouldn't have too much left If I decided to go somewhere tomorrow. So after work, I get the smart idea of driving to a real out of the way station in the boondocks of Beeline highway, in the middle of nowhere. I was betting there would be no line there, but also would stretch my existing supply very thin. If my bet failed, I wouldn't have enough gas to get home.

I press on.....I start to second guess myself as the bingo light on my car turns on signalling that I'm down to the last precious gallons. I turn off the a/c in an effort to stretch the remaining fuel. I also keep the windows up, so as not to upset the aerodynamic efficiency of the car. Minutes go by that seem like hours, as I sweat like a swine. I give in, and blast the a/c for 10 seconds at a time so as not to pass out in the 95 deg. heat.

There's no turning back now baby, I'm commited. I'm about to call myself stupid, when I see the yellow glimmer of the Shell station. But there's a line there too. Not as bad as the city, but a line nonetheless. I have no choice and get in line. I open the windows and turn off the engine as I watch strangers filling up their cars and container after container of gas. "I hope it doesn't run out" I think as I start to get nauseous from the gas fumes.

As I enter the perimeter of the station, the attendant closes the line behind me and signals everybody else to go home. "Whew!" that was close. Finally I'm only two cars away from the precious fluid, when I see the dude wrestling with the pump. He looks our way and signals with the cutthroat gesture that they are out of Regular.

"Holy shit" I think. He goes inside, and comes back out and starts pumping Plus. When I thought he was finished, he pulls out four 3 gallon containers out of his trunk "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! He's hoarding the gas!!" Ok he's done, one more car and I'm golden. This other Jackball parked with the tank on the wrong side and he takes forever to maneuver his tail into position. "Oh no!!!" I hear clicking coming from the nozzle and he just started filling. DEAR MOTHER OF GOD!!!! They are out of Plus. He goes inside and comes back and starts pumping V POWER 93 octane at $3.49 per gallon. At this point gas could've been $10.00 a gallon and I wouldn't have cared. I just wanted to get home. I'm cursing Dr. Gray and Max Mayfield, Ernesto, God and everybody else down the pike when I hear the magical clunk of the nozzle going back in the pump. YES YES THANK YOU JESUS!!! An hour and $41.88 later, I had 12 gallons in my tank and all was well again.

Now is off to Publix because the missus calls me panicking that she needs some crap. And that my friends was another mission onto itself, but I'm tired of typing, and you are probably bored to tears anyway... I think we should post some more skin while we have power... ERNESTO I CURSE THEE!!!!